TF Views

Shockwave wrote:Alright, I'm gonna have to school all of you. I worked at Blockbuster for 4 1/2 years and let me tell you: I've seen some shit. REAL shit. First up:

Gator Bait II. I've never seen Gator Bait one and after seeing 2, I hope I never do. Bad acting, directing, plot, everything just fails across the board. Unless you like seeing rednecks run around the woods for an hour and half, pray you never see this.

Zombie 2: George Romero's "Dawn of the Dead" was originally released internationally as Zombie. This movie has nothing to do with that. But it was titled "Zombie 2" to cash in on Romero's success. And sucks. Even for zombie movies. There's only one zombie and I don't recall that it ever even actually kills anyone.

Several of the Nightmare on Elm Street sequels were terrible.

Several of the Friday the 13th movies sucked (Jason X in particular comes to mind).

I flat out refused to watch any of the Big Momma's House movies just on principal.

And... you know what? Screw sequels, just bad movies all around:

What Dreams May Come: My dream is that I hadn't ever watched this movie.

Vampire in Brooklyn: Fuck that, I don't need to elaborate.

Natural Born Killers is my 3rd least favorite movie ever.

Jacob's Ladder is my second least favorite.

and first is some movie I don't know the title of. It was on late at night on HBO and had no plot, no discernible characters, and looked like someone's acid trip put on film.

Blair Witch Project. 'Nuff said.

Mortal Kombat: Anhilation.

Star Trek III: Finding Nimoy
Star Trek V: The Search for God
Star Trek: Nemesis

Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull
Final Destination 3
Austin Powers Goldmember
The last X Files movie
The "Honey I Shrunk the Kids" Sequels
the Nutty Professor movies
Flubber
Alien Resurrection

Alright, I think that's enough.

For now.

The first Big Momma's house movie I thought was decent,The 2nd one I thought was terrible as it was aimed for toddlers. the 3rd one called "Father & Son" was epic awful in every sense of the word.

I watched all the Nutty Professor movies,I'd say they were horrible movies. I'm just not a fan of using crude humor,potty humor,extreme zanny humor,extreme over weight mocking humor & so forth.

The "Father of the bride" 1st movie was okay,the 2nd movie was horrible & made no sense.

The die hard movies,I tried watching a few of them with my older cousin. he liked them all,I thought they were all extremely dull,booring,long,dragged on forever,tasteles,bland,obnoxious & so forth.

The first Two planet of the apes movies were okay & decent. the last Three planet of the apes 1970's sequels movies,I thought made no sense & were epic horrible.

I only saw bits & pieces of the various "Aliens" movies for a few minutes at a time. These movies turned me off because they were too gross,too graphic,too dull,too booring,too long,etc...

All the Ghostbusters Live action Theatre movies,I thought were epic garbage. as most of them came off as cheesy,corny,extreme clown humor,extreme toddler humor. far too many puns,tasteless jokes & zanny off the wall extreme comedy.

Shockwave wrote:

Mako Crab wrote:And the fact that seemingly everyone else loved it made it even more intolerable.

Thank you! Tell me about it! And the first response is always something stupid like "But it had a message!" Y'know what? So did To Die For with Nicole Kidman. Which had the same message and pulled it off way better.

Ugh, I've heard that so many times. "It has a message!!!" Pfft! Pretty much every movie sends a message to its audience whether the creators intend to or not. Case in point:

Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday- hm... let's look at the formula for the entire Friday the 13th series. Stupid teens go into the woods, have sex, and get killed. JGTH stars a man-child that's still clinging to his youth, but finds out he has a baby. He's the example of the stupid teen that didn't get killed. Now he's gotta grow up, be an adult, and take on his new responsibilities as a dad. Sounds like a great message to me!

But the writer/director never intended that, and has said a few times that he's pretty disappointed with the movie, and that he would've never put the baby in the movie, cuz it made everyone more boring. Go figure. His message: Hey! Here's Jason again! Put money in my pockets!

The only Star Trek film I'd say would be The Final Frontier. It easily was the worst Star Trek film from beginning to end.

Batman & Robin - While I don't think every Batman film needs to be dark and gritty, this film is just too over the top with the comedy. The amount of terrible puns in this film would give the Adam West series a run for its money.

Superman 3, 4 and Returns - 3 and 4 were so bad that Returns decided to ignore they existed. And Returns really wasn't better.

Spider-Man 3 - I've seen a lot of people say they thought Venom was the worst part of the film, but for me, I though Venom was one of the best parts of it. As a whole, it just wasn't all that good of a movie and didn't really do justice to the characters.

The Santa Claus sequels - As already mentioned it felt like these films were done simply for the paychecks. They weren't nearly as good as the first one.

Onslaught Six wrote:You know, everyone says this, but the more and more I think about it, the better it becomes. It's NOT the super-serious Dark And Gritty Batman, and it already is well aware of it. Clooney actually plays the best "stable Batman" I've ever seen. The Poison Ivy plotline has some hilarious and great bits. Schwarzenegger makes the worst Serious Mr. Freeze in the world but the best guy to spout hilarious bad ice puns for two hours. Bane and Batgirl are fucking terrible and I'm going to pretend not to remember them being in it.

Sometimes a bad movie makes me laugh, and I can get some entertainment out of it regardless of the level of badness. Batman and Robin has a few places that do that, but then there are long stretches that are just embarassing and make me cringe. Any time Poison Ivy shows up on screen is bad, which is a crime. I shouldn't be wanting to fast forward when Uma Thurman is on the screen, I should be enjoying the beautiful actress on the screen. But I'm not, because her acting is terrible and the part is written badly, and she's just stinking up the screen every time she appears.

Yeah, Schwarzenegger is amusing more often than not, but he's still got some pretty bad scenes. Really, no one comes out of this move unscathed except for Micheal Gough, who somehow has a serious and moving plotline in an otherwise cartoony and absurd movie.

Given my current interest in older comics, I will give the movie writers some credit for a fairly obscure continuity nod in the form of Julie Madison, Bruce Wayne's fiance from the early 40s. I suppose she does get a fairly dignified plotline as well, but she's barely in the movie so that's not too difficult.

T-2 had the same problem that the Three live action TF movies had. I dis-like it when extreme comedy is mixed with seriousness. I'm just not a fan of watching a Theathre movie that has one scene that is funny,then the next scene has serious killing,then the next scene has sex,then the next scene has toddler clown humor,then the next scene has obnoxious crude potty humor jokes.-----> I'm not a fan of a singular movie trying to please all age groups & covering all the emotions.

Most of the comedy you're referring to (I'm guessing one of them is the "Terminator smile" scene) weren't actually in the theatrical edition, which is the tighter, significantly better film. (If you listen to the commentary on the "Special Edition" that is super-common on DVD, James Cameron himself will even say that he was right to cut those scenes and that he prefers the theatrical version.)

Even so, there IS a reasonable place for it in the film when you consider that John Connor is a ten year old boy. I dunno how many ten year olds you hung out with in 1990 (or 1994 when the film takes place) but they were exactly like that.

I'll agree that T-4 wasn't that great. They could have come up with a better story. the story we got seemed like 20 writers were each given a few pages in the script & nobody did any collabration. it just seemed like a billion ideas were squeezed into this movie & most of those ideas were awful.

That's almost exactly what happened--tons of writers doing revision and revision on the thing, rewriting bits and pieces and then not going back to tidy up. And then they had even more writers on set, and even edited out entire plotlines during the editing phase.

It's worth noting, though, that I originally saw Salivation in pieces. I was living with my father, who has HBO, and during this time period, it was on literally All The Time. (HBO will do this; run the same handful of five or six movies for two months, and then that's it.) So I would go out to get something to eat, or find something I needed, or whatever, and watch ten or fifteen minutes of Salivation. And in those isolated bits, it seemed like a fucking awesome movie. John Connor/T-800 showdown? Young Kyle Reese? Human Terminator that John has no idea about? Acknowledgement that the timeline might be permanently fucked up? All super awesome stuff! It's just that it's tied together very poorly. It needed a real visionary director or writer to come to it and really give it one good, solid draft to say, "Yeah, this works." Unfortunately, the business doesn't always allow for that, and who knows what Terminator 5 is going to bring.

With Those various TMNT live action movies,I felt like those doing them knew they were creating garbage. it just felt like the main motivation for the sequels was to rake in the cash from the movie toy lines. Because as most know retailers & smaller type drug stores order more theatre toy lines than non-theatre toy lines.

Not to rake in money from, I don't know, movie profits?

Mako wrote:Christopher Lee is great in it (but when is he ever bad?).

Star Wars?

Seriously, fuck Count Dooku, Darth Maul should've been the main bad guy in all three.

Shocktrek wrote:Several of the Nightmare on Elm Street sequels were terrible.

Part 3 is unequivocally the best in the series; the first works for what it is, but Part 3 establishes so much better stuff about Freddy and the universe he inhabits, and has some of the best kills I've ever seen in a slasher flick. (You're prime time now, bitch!)

Part 2 is...alright, when you consider what you're looking at, but in the context of the whole series, it's weak and shitty. As a weirdo gay analogue/Freddy possessing someone flick, though? Hmmm.

Part 4 is servicable and great for that kind of "background slasher movie" vibe. Part 5 has some alright kills too (I love the comic book sequence) and the less said about 6, the better. New Nightmare is awesome if you look at it in supercontext of Wes Craven's work--it's like a predecessor to Scream. And then there's Freddy vs. Jason which is just awesome.

Natural Born Killers is my 3rd least favorite movie ever.

Really! I'm interested. I've got a love/hate with this movie; you really need to be in the mood for it. You can't argue with the fucking soundtrack though. Burn! You know, the best NIN song, ever!

Eyes Wide Shut. That's how this movie should be viewed. Or not at all. Ugh.

Elaborate! You can't drop a bomb like that and not explain.

Sparky wrote:Spider-Man 3 - I've seen a lot of people say they thought Venom was the worst part of the film, but for me, I though Venom was one of the best parts of it. As a whole, it just wasn't all that good of a movie and didn't really do justice to the characters.

Yeah, this movie blows. They try and do something with Sandman that just doesn't work (so now HE killed Uncle Ben? Fuck that!) and Topher Grace is just...not a good actor in general. (He is the worst part of Predators, which is an otherwise fantastic flick--even if it suffers from Robert Rodriguez Disease, which may, in fact, be a personal problem.)

I'll agree those Santa clause 2 & 3 movies were horrible. due to them being aimed at a much younger kids viewers than the 1st movie. the 2nd & 3rd ones were definately more corny,cheesy & had worse scripts,plots,dialogue.

Princess diaries 2 was much more horrible compared to the first one. Even though only 3 years passed since the 1st movie,Anne Hathaway looked like she literally aged 10 years in the 2nd movie. The story & plot were weaker. the dialogue was more corny/cheesy.

Those Lethal weapon movies were pure torture to watch. they were just so long,booring,dull & chock full of obnoxious/macho/corny/cheesy/outdated jokes/dialogue. the plots/stories. Joe Pesci & even joked on saturday night live in a "live skit parady" that his character was needed in some of these movies to make the movies funny,so viewers wouldn't fall asleep while watching them due to them being so booring.

Karate kid part 3 was hands down terrible & the worst of the lot. this movie made no sense,had almost no story. it was epic awful from start to finish.

The God Father part 3 wasn't as good as the first 2 movies. as the story made no sense. what little story/plot it had was pathetic.

I agree that the 2006 "Superman returns" movie was epic garbage in every way possible. it tries to erase the III & IV 1980's Superman movies & place this "Superman returns's" movie as the III in the 1980's francise. I thought the story,plot& dialogue were all weak. the actors/actresses didn't act that great in this film. ---> About the only positive thing this returns movie did was put a more beautiful lois lane in the role.

Onslaught Six wrote:

Mako wrote:Christopher Lee is great in it (but when is he ever bad?).

Star Wars?

Seriously, fuck Count Dooku, Darth Maul should've been the main bad guy in all three.

Nah, he was good in Star Wars. But I get where you're coming from. I was disappointed when part 3 started and they killed Dooku within the first 5 minutes (replacing him with the inferior Grievous).

And while Karate Kid 3 wasn't anything grand, The Next Karate Kid was even worse. The one where Mr. Miyagi takes on a female student.

Onslaught Six wrote:

Mako wrote:Christopher Lee is great in it (but when is he ever bad?).

Star Wars?

Seriously, fuck Count Dooku, Darth Maul should've been the main bad guy in all three.

Shocktrek wrote:Several of the Nightmare on Elm Street sequels were terrible.

Part 3 is unequivocally the best in the series; the first works for what it is, but Part 3 establishes so much better stuff about Freddy and the universe he inhabits, and has some of the best kills I've ever seen in a slasher flick. (You're prime time now, bitch!)

Part 2 is...alright, when you consider what you're looking at, but in the context of the whole series, it's weak and shitty. As a weirdo gay analogue/Freddy possessing someone flick, though? Hmmm.

Part 4 is servicable and great for that kind of "background slasher movie" vibe. Part 5 has some alright kills too (I love the comic book sequence) and the less said about 6, the better. New Nightmare is awesome if you look at it in supercontext of Wes Craven's work--it's like a predecessor to Scream. And then there's Freddy vs. Jason which is just awesome.

Natural Born Killers is my 3rd least favorite movie ever.

Really! I'm interested. I've got a love/hate with this movie; you really need to be in the mood for it. You can't argue with the fucking soundtrack though. Burn! You know, the best NIN song, ever!

Eyes Wide Shut. That's how this movie should be viewed. Or not at all. Ugh.

Elaborate! You can't drop a bomb like that and not explain.

Sparky wrote:Spider-Man 3 - I've seen a lot of people say they thought Venom was the worst part of the film, but for me, I though Venom was one of the best parts of it. As a whole, it just wasn't all that good of a movie and didn't really do justice to the characters.

Yeah, this movie blows. They try and do something with Sandman that just doesn't work (so now HE killed Uncle Ben? Fuck that!) and Topher Grace is just...not a good actor in general. (He is the worst part of Predators, which is an otherwise fantastic flick--even if it suffers from Robert Rodriguez Disease, which may, in fact, be a personal problem.)

I agree that Maul should have been the main bad guy for all three, but I'm not gonna hold that against Lee, he's still a good actor.

NBK... Yeah, I pretty much just hated this movie from beginning to end. And I even recall hating the music at the time (I didn't have the appreciation for metal that I do now). I pretty much hated the story, the acting, the weird inexplicable animated cut scenes, it pretty much just sucked on every level.

Eyes Wide Shut. I'm not really sure I can elaborate since I've blocked it from memory and there is not enough money on this planet to pay me to see it again. I do seem to recall thinking the whole thing was an excuse for Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman to be fucking a lot on the big screen. And there was some cult or something... I dunno, but I will say Tom Cruise should quit acting. I cannot watch a movie with him anymore whithout thinking "Oh goodie, it's Tom Cruise again". I mean, even in A Few Good Men, one of his best performances ever, I still can't tell you his character's name.

As for Spiderman 3, I actually liked it. I thought they actually did a good job, with the exception of casting Topher Grace who I agree should quit acting.

And for more epic movie sucktitude:

Weekend at Bernie's. There's an hour and a half of my life I want back. Doubly so for the sequel.

Anything with Martin Lawrence. That guy is my nemesis. Or I'm his. Whichever. It fits in comic book terms because we're exact opposites. He's an unfunny rich black guy that carries a gun and I'm a hilarious poor white guy who does not own any guns. But as for his movies, he's not funny and can't act and should not be on screen ever.

Breakin' Too: Electric Boogaloo. The gold standard on which all badness is measured.

Super Mario Bros. This has as much to do with the video games as water has to do with air (sure they both have oxygen but that's about the extent of it).

Ishtar: This movie was so bad that I'm pretty sure it HAS been erased from history.

Varsity Blues: Or pretty much any sports movie. My hatred of said movies most likely stems from my near prejudicial hatred of sports in general.

Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within: Again, this had as much to do with the game as... screw it, I don't have a funny analogy for this. But it had nothing in common but the name. And the plot was convoluted as well.

Pitch Black: Ok, so I'm really supposed to beleive that the predominant lifeforms on a planet that has sun for like 24 years straight can only come out on the one night they have for like 3 hours once every said 24 years? Sorry, not buying it on premise. Then there's Vin Diesel's acting (or lack thereof) and the overly cliched character he portrays. Oh yeah, I'm real scared because he's supposedly the McGuiver of serial killers who can take out 6 guards and a puppy if he's given a toothpick. Yeah, just a big pile of bullshit all around.

UNDERWORLD: I thought the first Underworld movie was somewhat decent. all the sequels were epic awful. The second movie was horrible due to it contradicting the first movie. the last one was so short it barely lasted 70 minutes,it also felt like it should have been a "made for TV" movie & not a theatre movie.

While the first Airplane movie was epic awful,the Second Airplane movie was leaps & bounds worse.

Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey was a really horrible sequel. the script/plot was awful,the dialogue was more corny/cheesy. the 2nd movie just felt like it was made for toddlers & not adults.

Those Harry Potter movies,I saw the first one,it wasn't that great but not epic awful. I still can't believe they made 7+Harry Potter movies. most of the sequels seems more corny,more cheesy,dragged on forever. some of the movies just felt like they made for toddlers. Most of the actors & actresses in these movies were horrible as far as acting skills went.