Another short story. This was a spoof of the G1 ep, "Heavy Metal War." It's basically my way of slamming all the ridiculous upgrades Optimus was getting in Armada and Energon at the time. It's also pretty ancient and I never did any proofing or editing on it. It was just a quick write for the hell of it.
G1 Megatron vs. Armada Prime
by Mako Crab
"According to Cybertronian law opposing leaders, you and I, Optimus Prime, may formally do battle to decide the outcome of the war," Megatron stated with a smug grin creeping up in the corner of his mouth. "And according to our customs, you MUST accept this challenge!"
It had been a day since the Decepticon leader had contacted the Autobots, but his words still rang loudly in Optimus Prime's mind. He didn't like it. If he knew Megatron, and he did, there was something fishy going on.
"Red Alert," Optimus asked while Megatron's image patiently waited on the monitor, "Is this for real? There's got to be some kind of loophole."
"I'm sorry, sir. It's all right here," Red Alert the Autobots' resident medic began. "Megatron is absolutely right. Once formally challenged to a fair, one-on-one duel, you must accept or forfeit your army."
"Peachy..."
The day of the duel had arrived and all of Megatron's Decepticons converged deep in the barren desert: Starscream, Thundercracker, Skywarp, Soundwave, Reflector, Ravage, Laserbeak, and all the rest. On the horizon they could see a formidable dust cloud kicking up. The Autobots, no doubt.
With roaring, sand-choked engines, the Autobots pulled into the makeshift arena and transformed into robot mode.
"Allright, Megatron, before we get it on, I want to make it very clear that I want no funny business from you!" A very authoritative looking Prime said while pointing his mighty index finger of truth and justice at the depraved Decepticon. Megatron was not amused.
"Is this some kind of joke?" Megatron asked. "Where's the real Optimus Prime? I challenged Prime, not his half-cousin!" Megatron was nearly yelling, the calm and smug expression gone from his face.
"Yes! You challenged me, Optimus Prime! Now it's time to get it on!"
Megatron suddenly realized his error. Of course, how could he have been so thoughtless? He only saw Prmie's face on the monitor, and everyone knows that every Prime looks alike! Stupid, stupid, stupid!
"Allright then, Prime. I'll fight you. And when I'm done with you, I'll make short work of the REAL Prime!"
"Ready any time you are, Mega-"
FOOM!
With a single hit, Megatron dropped Armada Prime to his hands and knees, winding him. Prime clutched his gut with one hand and balanced himself with the other.
"S- so strong! Never knew he was that strong! I mean, sure you see it on TV, but the real deal? No way. Never would've guessed. Ugh..."
"C'mon, Optimus! Get up! He just got in a lucky hit! You can take him," an enthusiastic Hot Shot yelled from the sidelines.
"He's right," Prime thought, "I CAN take him!"
With that, Prime lunged at Megatron, grappling his waist, trying to pick up the mighty Decepticon. Megatron stood motionless, letting Prime struggle with all his might to lift him off the ground. Amused to the point of laughter, Megatron delivered an elbow strike to Prime's back and the Autobot fell to the ground for the second time in less than 30 seconds.
"PRIME!" Hot Shot and Red Alert shouted in unison.
The observing Decepticons were rolling on the ground with laughter! The humiliation was too great! Prime could stand it no longer!
"Allright, Megatron! The warm-up's over! Time to get serious!" Prime said, now back on his feet. "Have a taste of my... Prime Guns!"
But before Optimus could break out his "Prime Guns," Megatron leveled his fusion canon at him and fired, disintegrating much of his armor and sending him crashing to the ground in a deadening cacaphony of metal and earth. Megatron watched for a moment as the crowd went silent, but Prime did not move.
"Okay, cool. Next week I fight the REAL Optimus!" The Decepticons got up and began to leave when the creaking of stiff, agonizing metal joints yelled out of the dust cloud that had become Prime's resting place.
"We're not done yet, Megatron!"
"PRIME! It's not possible!"
"Optimus Prime, Super Mode!" The Decepticons didn't know what they were seeing. Suddenly Prime's trailer combined with him to form a towering monstrosity of a robot! "Okay, Decepticon. Time to feel the hurt!"
Megatron fired his canon again, but Prime put his arms up to protect his face. No problem. Megatron kept firing and found that Prime stayed pretty well put, constantly blocking his face and taking all the shots. Prime went down again.
"Well, that's that. Now as I was saying, same time next week. The REAL Pri-" But no sooner could Megatron say it than Armada Prime was back on his feet!
"Jetfire, combine with me!" Prime ordered. In mere moments, the Autobot second-in-command had combined with Optimus to form Super Pants Prime!
"Hey! That's no fair," Starscream shouted. "The rules clearly state that each warrior must fight as they are with no help from anyone else!"
"Oh, I'm sure," Prime retorted, "Just like I'm sure that Megatron isn't running on Super Energon or secretly using the powers of all his troops or something evil like that!"
"But I'm not," Megatron dumbfoundedly replied.
"Yeah, well we'll just see about that. Check out this firepower!"
Super Pants Prime unleashed a barrage of rockets and laser fire that cut a swath into the desert floor. The blast knocked all the Decepticons to their feet and pummelled Megatron, who took the brunt of the attack! But through the constant stream of lasers and rockets, Megatron threw his right arm forward and managed a shot from his canon that struck Optimus square on in the chest, knocking him down!
The lasers silent, the Decepticons could finally see the damage their leader had taken; not too serious considering the amount of firepower he'd just taken. Crazy. He probably should've been dead from all that firepower, but hey, they're not going to complain.
"Not yet, Megatron... It's not over yet!"
"Yeah, Prime! Allright!" The cheerful Hot Shot shouted.
"Overload, combine!" And in moments, Optimus was wearing a huge backpack of pure, unadulterated destructive power in the form of two massive shoulder canons; the sum total of the Autobot known as Overload. Now towering over the Decepticon, Prime took aim and fired everything he had!
Using all his agility to dodge the barrage, Megatron closed the gap between them and transformed his right hand into an energon mace. With skilled precision, he clonked Prime upside the head, bringing him down yet again! But this time the price was high. Megatron had not been able to avoid all the shots and was now pock-marked with laser burns and serious cracks in his outer casing.
This time it was over. No more Prime. No more of that crazy business. Megatron took a deep breath in disbelief. He had greatly under-estimated his adversary. No matter which Prime, he would always remember that fighting any Prime is dangerous. Yes, dangerous is the word. The Decepticons turned and started for their underwater base.
"S-soundwave... here, take my fusion canon. It's so h-heavy."
Soundwave reached to detach his leaders' main weapon, but it just crumbled in his grip.
"Oh." Megatron exclaimed. He took another step when the Earth began to rumble! "What!? No! It can't be!"
From a blinding flash of light Optimus Prime rose again! Enhanced with a new body, Armada Prime had become.... Energon Prime!
"Let's get right to it then!" Prime shouted.
In a flurry of transformations, Prime combined with his new assortment of "Prime Force" limbs which were all seperate vehicles parked on his new trailer. Then he combined with Wing Saber, a new Autobot, and Omega Supreme, a legendary warrior that had smoked Unicron once upon a time. And all the Mini-Cons came out to party, augmenting Prime's power by 20-fold! There must've been at least 12 Mini-Cons hanging off of Prime! AND THEN! Then Primus imbued Optimus with super powers that made him the size of a planet!
Prime was no longer able to stand in the desert and instead hovered over Earth, his power having reached truly insane levels.
"Oh you have got to be kidding me!," an enraged Megatron shouted. "Even I don't fight this dirty!"
"What's wrong, Megs," Hot Shot scoffed, "Too much for ya?"
A weary and battered Megatron hung off of Soundwave's shoulder. "Soundwave, what should I do? There's no way I can beat that."
"Perhaps, commander..." Soundwave began, "... there is a way."
Megatron and Soundwave huddled for a second when the Decepticon leader began cackling with mad joy!
Red Alert, Hot Shot and the other Autobots scoffed. Megatron had finally lost it. But then! Megatron hobbled his way back to the desert arena, no longer using Soundwave like a crutch.
"As of this moment I have upgraded to "Transformers: The Movie" status!" Megatron shouted. Except that nothing changed about him. His armor was still cracked and scorched. His canon was still in shambles at his feet. But with renewed confidence, Megatron flew up into space to face Prime head-on!
"What the?! What's he going on about, "Transformers: The Movie" status?" Hot Shot asked.
Red Alert replied, "I have no idea. He must've finally gone insane. We shouldn't have anything to worry- WAIT! No! NOOOO! PRIME, GET OUT OF THERE! RUN, YOU DUMB FOOL! RUUUUUUN!!!!!"
But Prime was too far up to hear anything Red Alert said. All he could see was the tiny spec that was Megatron flying up to confront him. He prepared to unleash everything at his disposal, but first, why not have a little fun? Let Megatron see how useless and futile his power is now.
"KILL HIM, PRIME! DON'T PLAY GAMES! DO IT BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE!!!!!" Red Alert screamed at the top of his lungs. The other Decepticons grinned. They knew what was happening.
All of a sudden there was a brilliant flash of light in the sky and when it was gone... so was Prime! Annihilated into nothing!
Megatron returned to Earth, still looking like a burnt out heap of scrap.
"Huh... HuhHahHA! HAHAHA! Movie status means I get one-hit-kills!"
THE END
